The Committee On Public Morals
The Senate met in Sacramento city;
On public morals it had no committee
Though greatly these abounded. Soon the quiet
Was broken by the Senators in riot.
Now, at the end of their contagious quarrels,
There's a committee but no public morals.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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Poesy
Successive bards pursue Ambition's fire
That shines, Oblivion, above thy mire.
The latest mounts his predecessor's trunk,
And sinks his brother ere himself is sunk.
So die ingloriously Fame's _elite_,
But dams of dunces keep the line complete.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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Judgment
I drew aside the Future's veil
And saw upon his bier
The poet Whitman. Loud the wail
And damp the falling tear.
'He's dead-he is no more!' one cried,
With sobs of sorrow crammed;
'No more? He's this much more,' replied
Another: 'he is damned!'
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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An Explanation
'I never yet exactly could determine
Just how it is that the judicial ermine
Is kept so safely from predacious vermin.'
'It is not so, my friend: though in a garret
'Tis kept in camphor, and you often air it,
The vermin will get into it and wear it.'
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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A Fair Division
Another Irish landlord gone to grass,
Slain by the bullets of the tenant class!
Pray, good agrarians, what wrong requires
Such foul redress? Between you and the squires
All Ireland's parted with an even hand
For you have all the ire, they all the land.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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Rimer
The rimer quenches his unheeded fires,
The sound surceases and the sense expires.
Then the domestic dog, to east and west,
Expounds the passions burning in his breast.
The rising moon o'er that enchanted land
Pauses to hear and yearns to understand.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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The Eastern Question
Looking across the line, the Grecian said:
'This border I will stain a Turkey red.'
The Moslem smiled securely and replied:
'No Greek has ever for his country dyed.'
While thus each patriot guarded his frontier,
The Powers stole all the country in his rear.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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On The Wedding Of An Aeronaut
Aeronaut, you're fairly caught,
Despite your bubble's leaven:
Out of the skies a lady's eyes
Have brought you down to Heaven!
No more, no more you'll freely soar
Above the grass and gravel:
Henceforth you'll walk-and she will chalk
The line that you're to travel!
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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On The Wedding Of The Aeronaut
Aeronaut, you're fairly caught,
Despite your bubble's leaven: Out of the skies a lady's eyes
Have brought you down to Heaven!
No more, no more you'll freely soar
Above the grass and gravel: Henceforth you'll walk-and she will chalk
The line that you're to travel!
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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Phil' Crimmins
Still as he climbed into the public view
His charms of person more apparent grew,
Till the pleased world that watched his airy grace
Saw nothing of him but his nether face
Forgot his follies with his head's retreat,
And blessed his virtues as it viewed their seat.
poem by Ambrose Bierce
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