Soldier's Reality

The drums of war beat in the distance,
A constant beat of gun shots.
The men and boys fighting.
Waiting for the war to end, to go back home.

They sit in the cover of the long grass,
Guns loaded, hearts pounding.
They wait for a signal, a sign,
To rise, run, and fire.

Till then they sit, watching, bullets passing by.
They watch people falling, their lives leaving.
Nothing matters to them except that they live,
That they get to see their family again.

Smoke hangs in the air,
A thick mist that reminds them that they're at war,
Keeping them in reality, keeping their eyes open.
The constant rhythm of guns against heart beats,
Both pounding, both screaming.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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Regrets I Do Not Keep

Loosing your innocence is easy,
Like lying to your mom about having another cookie,
Doing something you'll regret, is easy.

Sometimes you have something so great,
And you don't know how important it is,
you don't see it's worth until it's too late,
You don't hold it to your heart, you don't keep it safe,
And then you lose it, and you see, it was great.

Falling to a higher power of want is so easy,
Like waving at a stranger in a car you pass on your way to work,
Becoming a victim to sin and temptation is easy.

So many things in life are given to you to keep,
And some of them you could never give up,
Like the right to show your feelings, the right to smile, to weep,
And these things you take as a given, yet they are truly a gift.
And some of these gifts we treat like nothing, some we do not keep.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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Heartbreak

Heartbreak; so much pain, so much sorrow.
Heartbreak; how could you do this to me?
Heartbreak; it fills my mind it kills my soul.
Heartbreak; when will my suffering end?

Depression; all I have left to embrace, to love
Depression; what you left me for after you stole my heart
Depression; something you will never understand.
Depression; what I look towards as you rip my heart apart.

Heartache; the pain that fills my body, my mind
Heartache; how my heart felt when you ripped my heart from my chest,
Heartache; it drowns my thoughts in my tears,
Heartache; what it is I feel whenever I think of your false love

Desolation; the ruins you have left my spirit in.
Desolation; how can you remain so naïve to what you make us feel?

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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A Moment

She walks through the rain, the pain locked behind her cold eyes
She sees the lights of the houses, those Christmas lights,
She sees her home, no lights, no tree, it is dark and still
The rain falls on her long white hair, her white gown flowing tears stream from her eyes
They are silver and full of sorrow and pain they splash against the wet street
And shine like silver perils against the black cold surface.

A car passes and for a moment she thinks the driver saw her, in her gown
For a moment she thought she was alive
Just for a moment

She sees the road stretch before her, she sees the lights that line each house
It is Christmas eave her mother and father are at church for their first Christmas sermon without her there, her eyes fill with more tears and more perils fall to the road
A bird flew above her, a dove
Her mothers favorite bird is a dove, she always says look to the dove for answers
The girl never understood her mothers words, now she knows

For a moment she smiles
For a moment she feels no pain
Just for a moment

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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The Diary Of A Young Girl (diary From An Angel)

Dear Diary,

Daddy was on the couch again
Mommy left again.

I walked alone to school today,
Somtimes i feel alone, sometimes I feel like a real lady.

My friend left me at lunch,
I was alone, I miss her a bunch.

I got a bruise from daddy,
He told me I have to do what he says, and call him daddy

Mommy got home late tonight,
But thats no different from every night.

Daddy put me in bed with him,
I said I didn't want to, but he made me do it with him.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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First Time

Your hands run over my breast
You slide into me as my body welcomes you as a guest
Your body moves as mine follows the steady pace
As your body bulids it becomes a race.
My mind fills with this lust, this power
It shall not let me cower
As the slow beat of music plays
I think of how how this memmory shall stay,
In my soul, in my heart.
My body waits for the feelings to start.
As reality hits I remember this is my first
But now the need for more fills my heart with it's thirst
You move faster, and the pain fills my veins, my blood
The pain quickly lessons as my thoughts turn to mud
Here and now is all that matters, all I seak
My body arches as we reach the peak.
Your movements start to slow
Making movements a steady flow
You retreat from my body yet remain in my grasp
As our breaths turn to steady gasps.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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In A Room Of So Many

In this room I am one with myself,
I sit alone, away from them, from the people,
I sit in the chair in the back, with only myself,
None notices me except the two people next to me.

They sit around me laughing with friends, playing their games,
They are all happy, all together, with one another,
But thats what it is to them, a game,
They don't need more people they don; t need another.

The girl on my right sits, lost, in her book,
Maybe she's there with the characters, in the past, or maybe the futrue,
She looks from word to word page to page within her book.
This is her pasttime, her fantsy, she is lost to know the books future.

To my left a boy sits facing the wall, music playing,
Both thumbs pressed against the small arrow keys,
POKeMON is what he sits and plays;
The small animals battleing growing, and looking for keys.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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Why? (Death part: 1)

Why do people fear me?
Why do the long for the day I appear to them to never come?
Why can't they look at me like a friend, not a foe?
Why do kids think of me and cry?
I am only the next chapter.

Why do people in church pray I shall never come?
Why do they look to god and ask 'what have I done'?
Why do they look above and think 'why must I leave? '?
Why do they want to have eternity?
I would give them just that.

Why can't they look at me and smile?
Why can't they stand side by side with me as friends?
Why can't we all stay together as family?
Why can't we live as one?
That's what we are we live together side by side.

Why can't they know who I am before they hide from my path?
Why can't they look in my eyes and know the truth of me?

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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Smile!

Smile,
Look at the sky,
Forget about everything and just,
Smile!

Laugh,
Open your mouth,
And throw back your head and just,
Laugh!

Dance,
Move your body to the music,
Or move to the rhythm of silence and just,
Dance!

Sing,
Open your heart,
Let out all your thoughts and just,
Sing!

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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So They Say

Time fixes everything,
Or so they say.
Die from a broken heart and it will mend,
Or so they say.
Watch your dreams fall apart and a new door will open,
Or so they say.
Live and love and you will be happy,
Or so they say.
Work hard and you will be recognized for your success,
Or so they say.
Forgive those who hurt you and you will feel better,
Or so they say.
Show your friends you love them and they will never hurt you,
Or so they say.
Be patient and in time you will get what you want,
Or so they say.
Sleep and you will feel rested,
Or so they say.
Let your tears fall; you'll grow stronger and not cry for the same thing twice,
Or so they say.

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poem by Bethany Maxwell
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