This Beast Of Me

Does it really matter when I draw the blade?
Do you truly care about memories that fade?
You told me that night, to flee or fight
So now I'm just calling on the belief that I am right

Do you have the power to judge me?
Not on the person I was but the animal which I shall be
Or the ability to retrieve my heart from the abyss
That has eaten my soul with one simple kiss

If you believe in what I once was you're a fool
I am now a part of the darkness that I rule
The words you said, and the whispers I heard
Once so deafening, now have re-emerged

So I look at you now and hope to see
A being that can finally set me free
Someone who can handle this version of me
Or kill the me that this beast causes me to be

poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Confusion

You trap me, confuse me, and use me
But we both know you'll never loose me
You are mine and I am yours but it hurts
To think that you don't see this as I do

You fight me, slight me, your words bite me
Yet you spend every day and night with me
You swear you won't fall but it's too late
You know this and you should accept your fate

You refuse these ties, listen to lies and avoid my eyes
But you won't let me suffer with silent cries
So I ask you this if you want to leave
Why do search so hard for a lie to believe?

You search for an escape, perfect dreamscape
But all your sweet dreams take a single shape
You fight the feeling but you know it's too true
It seems, my dear, that you've fallen in love with me too

poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Someone I Won't Miss

There’s fire in your eyes
No, wait that’s just your lies
Sorry did I make you sad
Well I really don’t feel bad

You hurt me, left me scared and clawed
I never knew you were so flawed

Don’t worry I give it all back
Because I realised I never did lack
All those things you said I missed
Once I got out the poison of your kiss

You hurt me, left me scared and clawed
I never knew you were so flawed

Once I thought I was so alive
No more struggling to survive
But you showed me I was wrong
Showed me everyone betrays you before long

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Secret Glances

You know, I sneak a peek
In your general direction
Coz it’s your attention I seek
Though they say you are no perfection

I see you but will never know
What you thoughts are or if you see
When you look, my heart is no longer slow
But I daren’t ask so the fool is me

So I write with my heart the love
That I feel for you coz I’m a child
I wish I was as beautiful as a white dove
But as you see I’m nothing special so mild

So if by chance you see this please don’t hate
Because I really am scared of what you think
And always worry that its already too late
Or that you will see me and feel no link

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Clean: Competition, Repetition

To all the children that cry and scream
‘This room is just too sparkly clean! '
To all the adults that moan about the mess
I believe that you all have something to confess

These books and toys are placed upon the floor
To convince the siblings that they have more
Your ornaments are shiny new and clean
Because you have no feathers to show nor preen

Deep down in your minds you all know
The reasons these actions are repeated so
To the children this is a play, a fun little game
And to the adults? Well I must say it's the same

So the next time you walk into the ‘danger site'
Dear parents you know what they try to do, right?
And to you children who think ‘why are they so mean! '
You should know that's the way it has always been

poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Evil scars

Simple desires grow twisted
Your mind blanketed with evil so dark
The only way anyone knows you existed
Are the scars you left as your mark?

Too many fell by your poison claws
You were such a vicious inhumane being
But now you have been punished by my holy laws
What did you think you were seeing?

I hoped you would love me
And let love heal your wound
But we don’t fit together do we
But now we will always be bound

I tried so hard to forgive your sins
But now you might be gone forever
Losing your demonic wings
But i will follow you wherever

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Under A Sky So Blue

This cynical town will never die
Something lost can’t be saved
Doesn’t matter the tears you cry
Can’t stop this way that’s been paved

I find it strange nothing new
Never knew it was a danger
Under a sky so blue
Never feared that stranger

What’s the point if it’s lost?
Something we want to hide
Who cares at what cost
As long as by the laws we abide

Don’t tell me to leave it be
Its wrong never been so right
Why, why won’t you see!
Where is that kind light?

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Sit Waiting

Should I sit and wait for this fate
Or am I just that second too late
Please tell me if I should laugh or cry
Because I feel like the clouds that colour the sky
Misunderstood and despised
All because of your bloody little lies
However understand this, my friend
There's only so much a truth can bend
Before it breaks and draws the owners blood
Just because you didn't believe it could
I know now where sitting on your hands leads
It leads to you being the one that bleeds
In repentance for those that lie and deny
So don't sit around and wait for a reply
Walk, run or crawl it doesn't matter as long as you move
Because one day there will come a time to prove
Just what you are capable of creating
But that chance doesn't appear if you sit waiting

poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Cycle Unbroken

Walking in circles, never ending
This world is so messed up, crazy
Surely a disasters impending
But everything I see is hazy

According to you everything’s perfect
You walk forward, don’t look, never stopping
Never seeing and never do you suspect
Out of sanity, this world is dropping

Listen, the children are singing
Of this worlds loss, sorrow, pain
You are deaf to their voices, over the ringing
But watch them stand tall, in this deathly rain

This sinister cycle must end soon
Before this sun sets over the sea
Before the night marked by the rising moon
End this cycle and set the oppressed free

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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Princess

Sweet lips, petal soft, rose red
Two turtle doves, the lies you said
Sea blue eyes, caring and sharing
Coal black heart, such a strange pairing

Whispered lies, broken ties, its all the same
When can we stop playing this game?
Hands that hold but a burning love so cold
Nothing is as it seems or so I've been told

Fashion and passion both need money
So bleed the only way you can honey
You can fall in love after the ceremony
Where's my prince on his golden pony?

They said that once the rings were worn
Our fortune and fame would be born
Sweet words to a foolish princess
Shame there was no pea in this test

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poem by Rebecca Pepper
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