Elf Explanatory

The Elves are Santa's helpers.
And this is true because.
According to English Grammar
They are a Subordinate Claus.

poem by Edward Iacona
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Dog - Er - Ill

A mixed breed is now a 'Designer Dog'
However, there's a big 'But'.
Not so very long ago that pup
Was referred to as just a mutt.

poem by Edward Iacona
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Vortext

VORTEXT
Edward Iacona

In math it's taught Pi R Square
But this is what I've found
No matter how you slice it
Pi is usually round.

poem by Edward Iacona
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Off The Hook

OFF THE HOOK
Edward Iacona

My kids don't like fish very much
But I could not be happier.
They aren't eating at home tonight
So I'll make Salmon or Tilapia.

poem by Edward Iacona
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Ter-mights?

TER-MIGHTS?
Edward Iacona

It's a very frustrating feeling,
When one can enjoy some "SALSA",
If one needs to come up with Oak
And all one has is Balsa.

poem by Edward Iacona
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Mating Menu

MATING MENU
Edward Iacona

Looks, position and some wealth are
The main dishes on the dating platter.
And if one has the last one as a rich dessert.
The first two courses won't much matter.

poem by Edward Iacona
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New Herizons

Well, it's over and I am single
Yet my hopes are not dimmin'
To find someone special in my life,
Sends my imagination swimmin'
A romantic re-start with a loving heart
And with some serious 'Shein' ' and 'Himin' '.
But this I learned about divorce court,
It's a bad place to try and meet women.

poem by Edward Iacona
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So, What's Noose?

SO, WHAT'S NOOSE?
Edward Iacona

There's a magazine about weddings
That is named, "THE KNOT".
It has articles about marriage
And bridal fashions that are hot

There's focus on the Bride - to - be
And about having her special day.
Here's pre-marital advice for the grooms,
Is just leave off the "K"

poem by Edward Iacona
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You're Toast

YOU'RE TOAST
Edward Iacona

When it comes to getting married
There is this lesson to learn,
Beware of toasting flutes that say,
"To Whom It May Concern".

Another version that can cause stress
Or might leave one quite perplexed,
Would be the matched pair of glasses
That refers to you as, "NEXT".

poem by Edward Iacona
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Bamboozled

There is some things we do in life
We wish we could retrieve
The one action that triggers another
Having a result we can't conceive

That includes a hope or dream
That does not come true
Or, just not in quite the way
In which we would like it to

One of those moments I'd take back
That can still make me sigh and grieve
Was buying her a 'Good Fortune' bamboo plant
Never thinking that she’d ever leave

poem by Edward Iacona
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