Remarriage(A funny story)

Middle aged Santa and Jeeto were discussing life, and preparing wills. The conversation turned to remarriage...
Jeeto: If I should die first, will you remarry?
Santa: Probably, I wouldn`t like to spend the rest of my life alone.
Jeeto: Would you bring your new wife into our home that we have shared?
Santa: I don`t see why not. It would be empty, you wouldn`t be there.
Jeeto: Would you share the same bed we`ve shared?
Santa: Well, it`s a comfortable bed...
Jeeto: Would you let here wear my clothes?
Santa: Sure, if they fit. They are quite nice.
Jeeto: Would you let her use my golf clubs?
Santa: No way, Preeto(Banta's wife) is left handed.

poem by Edwin Drood
Added by Poetry Lover
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Caring medicos! (A funny story)

Santa took his elderly father to a nursing home to check it out. He sat his father down on a sofa in the main aisleway and went to talk with the administrators.
Santa`s father started to tilt slowly toward the left.
A Doctor came by and said, 'Let me help you.'
The Doc piled several pillows on the left side of Santa`s father so he would stay upright. Santa`s father started to tilt slowly to the right. An orderly noticed and put several more pillows on his right side to keep him upright. Santa`s father started to lean forward when a nurse came by and piled several pillows in front of him. About this time, Santa returned. Santa, 'Well, Dad, isn`t this a nice place.'
Santa`s father replied, 'I guess it`s ok, but they won`t let me fart.'

poem by Edwin Drood
Added by Poetry Lover
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

America vs Germany vs India(A funny story)

In a ship the Generals of three nations were traveling with their soldiers. They started the topic that whose soldier had more of guts.
The American general called for one of his men and told him to jump down the ship and take a round swimming around the moving ship. The soldier did as he was commanded and the general boasted of by saying 'See the guts! '
Now the German general called out for one of his men and asked him to take two similar rounds. The soldier did as he was told.
When he came back from the water the German said, 'See the guts.'
Now the Indian General called out for his most courageous man, Santa and asked him to take five similar rounds.
Santa promptly replied, 'Am I your dad`s servant? '
At this the general proudly said 'See the guts'.

poem by Edwin Drood
Added by Poetry Lover
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Chronic disease! (A not so funny story)

An army Major visiting the sick army men, went to one soldier and asked, 'What's your problem, Soldier? '
'Chronic syphilis, Sir.'
'What treatment are you getting? '
'Five minutes with the wire brush each day.'
'What's your ambition? '
'To get back to the front, Sir.'
'Good man, ' said the Major.

He went to the next bed, 'What's your problem, Soldier? '
'Chronic piles, Sir.'
'What treatment are you getting? '
'Five minutes with the wire brush each day.'
'What's your ambition? '
'To get back to the front, Sir.'
'Good man, ' barked the Major.

He moved to the next bed where Santa was lying and asked, 'What's your problem, Soldier? '
'Chronic gum disease, Sir'
'What treatment are you getting? '
'Five minutes with the wire brush each day.'

[...] Read more

poem by Edwin Drood
Added by Poetry Lover
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Lucky santa! ! (A funny story)

Santa goes into his son`s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having a nightmare - Santa wakes him and asks his son if he is OK? The son replies he is scared because he dreamt that his aunt had died. Santa assures the son that Auntie is fine and sends him to bed.
The next day, Auntie dies. One week later, Santa again goes into his son`s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare - Santa again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that his grandmother had died. The father assures the son that she is fine and sends him to bed.
The next day, grandmother dies. One week later, Santa again goes into his son`s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare, he again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that his daddy had died. The father assures the son that he is OK and sends the boy to bed.
Santa goes to bed but cannot sleep because he is so terrified. The next day, Santa is scared for his life- he is sure is going to die. After dressing he drives very cautiously to work fearful of a collision. He doesn`t eat lunch because he is scared of food poisoning. He avoids everyone for he is sure he will somehow be killed. He jumps at every noise, starts at every movement and hides under his desk.
After days work, upon walking in his front door, he finds his wife, Jeeto, 'Good God, Dear, ' he proclaims, 'I`ve just had the worst day of my entire life! '
Jeeto responds, 'You think your day was bad, this morning my ex-boyfriend dropped dead on the front steps! '

poem by Edwin Drood
Added by Poetry Lover
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!